Rocket Fuel
I hate Roger Clemens.
But that's not news.
I think I've hated Roger Clemens since he was a Red Sox hurler in 1986, grinning, laughing and high-fiving in the Boston dugout in the waning moments of Game 6 of the World Series. Y'know, right before Stanley to Mookie to Buckner to pandamonium at the House of the Holy in Flushing.
But when Clemens, the head-hunting, lying, cheating, 'roid-shooting, redneck, beaned Mike Piazza in 2000, and then followed it up with the bat-throwing incident in the World Series that season, well, my hatred was taken to a whole new level, beyond even my hatred for Larry "Chipper" Jones.
Frankly, I wished Clemens would just die. And not quickly. Like in a farming accident.
And while, for me, Clemens' name on the Mitchell Report was a wet dream cum true in its own right, Friday morning's headline in The Trentonian made me as giddy as a school girl.
Sure, The Trentonian is a rag -- they of the Page 6 Girls and the "Roasted Nuts" headline after a fire at a mental institution -- but, to me, the destruction of my enemies -- not to mention the height of shtick -- has always trumped my desire for responsible journalism.
God bless the First Amendment.
But that's not news.
I think I've hated Roger Clemens since he was a Red Sox hurler in 1986, grinning, laughing and high-fiving in the Boston dugout in the waning moments of Game 6 of the World Series. Y'know, right before Stanley to Mookie to Buckner to pandamonium at the House of the Holy in Flushing.
But when Clemens, the head-hunting, lying, cheating, 'roid-shooting, redneck, beaned Mike Piazza in 2000, and then followed it up with the bat-throwing incident in the World Series that season, well, my hatred was taken to a whole new level, beyond even my hatred for Larry "Chipper" Jones.
Frankly, I wished Clemens would just die. And not quickly. Like in a farming accident.
And while, for me, Clemens' name on the Mitchell Report was a wet dream cum true in its own right, Friday morning's headline in The Trentonian made me as giddy as a school girl.
Sure, The Trentonian is a rag -- they of the Page 6 Girls and the "Roasted Nuts" headline after a fire at a mental institution -- but, to me, the destruction of my enemies -- not to mention the height of shtick -- has always trumped my desire for responsible journalism.
God bless the First Amendment.
posted by SJPSandman at
12:26 PM
2 Comments:
This whole turn of events for Roger is very...satisfying isn't it? I mean, c'mon look at the size of the guy's head. If he didn't take roids, I'm afraid for his children....
By
Anonymous, at 1/08/2008 3:06 PM
I'm afraid for his children regardless. Their father is Roger Clemens. Who's to say the first time one of his kids breaks curfew daddy doesn't hurl a baseball at the kid's head at 95 MPH??
By
SJPSandman, at 1/08/2008 4:27 PM
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